14 Things That Don't Define You


"There will always be someone who can't see your worth. Don't let it be you." -Unknown

Am I liked? Am I cherished? Do they think I fit in? Will I ever be smart enough? Am I lovable? These are just a few questions that occasionally wander through our minds, almost on a daily basis. As individuals, we are constantly analyzing ourselves to determine who we are and what we have to offer the world. Yet sometimes, we forget that it isn’t our responsibility to determine that. It’s someone else’s and they have already determined a long time ago, who they want you to be. When you feel as if you’re losing yourself and you need a reminder, look at this list. You are not defined by…

  1. Your Degree
    • I’m sure the world is thrilled to know that you have an MBA or a PHD, but nobody truly cares. I am super proud of you for working hard to achieve that degree, but that’s not who you truly are. Sorry not sorry, but your level of education does not define who you are as a person. A degree is just a symbolic representation of your efforts, passion and goals.
      • Also, don't get me wrong. A degree is an impressive and monumental thing, in anybody's life. You should be proud if you are pursuing a degree or already have one.
        • *I'm just saying, it doesn't determine who you are, as an individual.
  2. Your Salary
    • Whether you make 5 figures, 6 figures or no figures, your income does not define who you are. Your money only has value for goods and that truly is the only purpose for it. So stop comparing yourself to those celebrity couples that are considered “power couples”. If you take away their salary, do they still have “power”?
  3. Your Past
    • Your mistakes and tribulations do not justify who you are right now, in this day and age. Yeah, you may have made a few inappropriate choices back in the day, but you have changed since then. No matter what, you are stronger mentally, emotionally and maybe even physically. The past is the past.
  4. Your Race
    • I’m sorry that society constantly reminds you of your pigmentation, or your lack of. You are not defined by your stereotype and you are not defined by your race’s demographics. Take away the pigment and we are all the same color on the inside.
  5. Your Political Views
    • So you like Donald Trump and what he stands for? Cool. Questionable, but still cool. So you like Hillary Clinton, also questionable but still cool. Although politics places us in categories, you are not defined by your opinion on abortion, immigration or healthcare. Yeah, those things makes a difference in the world, but how does your political preference, define who you are, as a person?
      • No offense to any major candidates, I will be voting in this upcoming election. No throwing of shade is intended in this message.
  6. Your Gender
    • You are not defined by your body parts, nor should you ever believe that you are. If you are a Man, awesome possum. If you are a Woman, then totally tubular. Not a big deal. We’re all Homo sapiens at the end of the day, so please don’t define yourself off of your gender. You are far more than that.
  7. Your Sexuality
    • Gay, Straight, Lesbian, Curious, Bisexual, blah blah blah. So many labels with so much emphasis on each one. You are not defined by who you love or who you lay your head down next to, at night. You are your own person and that’s all that matters. Do what’s right for you and forget about the haters.
  8. Your Friendships
    • Whether you have 5 really close friends or only 1, they don’t define. Just because you’re friends with a celebrity…doesn’t make you any more (or less) special. Just because your friends are all Christian or you all go to Youth Group together, it doesn’t define your strength in your faith or who you are.
  9. Your Religion
    • Your religion is a representation of who you worship and/or pray to; whether that be God, Allah, Buddha, or whomever, that does not define you. Your religion just empowers you and keeps you standing, when sometimes all you want to do is fall over. (Although, sometimes it’s good to kneel)
  10. Your Appearance
    • So you like crop tops and miniskirts? Good for you! You like baseball jerseys and high waisted shorts? Comfy… I like! Or you like to contour and highlight your makeup every day, (you must have a lot of time to get ready in the morning, more power to you!) It doesn’t matter! How you like to dress, how you style your hair or how you do your makeup, is not a clear representation of who you are.
  11. Your Age
    • Pre-Teens, Teens, Young Adult with stress, Big Adult with more stress, Mid-life crisis age and Senior citizens! All of these stages have 1 thing in common, numbers. Whether you’re 16, 21 or 55, your age is just a representation of how far you’ve come in life. Don’t let that number run a course on your life and try to control who you are as an individual.
  12. Your Relationship status
    • I feel like this one is a BIG problem for many people, sometimes myself. I know it must be hard being the single friend out of all your friends, but trust me… your time is coming. Don’t let the sight of Facebook Life Events determine where you’re going in life or even your emotions, your time is coming.
  13. Your Music
    • Now don’t get me wrong, I love my Francesca Battistelli, Hillsong Worship and Danny Gokey….but, I really do enjoy Future, The Weeknd, Drake and maybe on a throwback Thursday, N’Sync. Just because you listen to your worship songs on the way to church and blast your secular music on the way back (guilty), doesn’t make you any less of a person.
  14. Your Hobbies/Interests
    • Some people like going to the club, other people like watching horror movies. Nothing wrong with either of those, as long as you’re going with the right intentions. We can’t all like the same thing or think the same way, so why does it even matter?

Then, what defines us?

Our Heavenly Father defines who we are; he defines every aspect of our mind, body and spirit. He is the ONLY person on the planet that can define who you are. I believe that everyone was given a divine spirit and this spirit is only for you and nobody else. With this spirit, you are to learn who you are as an individual, how your life impacts others and what your purpose is. 2 Corinthians 1:22 says “You are defined by God and God alone. He identifies you as his own.” See. The Bible even says it. Only God defines you and nobody else.

I believe that when we don’t know who we are or where we’re going in life, we fall susceptible to people telling us what we are. We feel as if others begin to know us better than ourselves and that’s when we fall into a trap. This trap is full of words that have NO value to us as children of God. Don’t let yourself fall into this trap of letting others tell you who you are, you are who God says you are.

Your heavenly Father created you, just the way he wants you to be. Stretch marks, cellulite, skinny, short and all those other things. He knows who you are and you don’t need people to tell you. You are so precious and if only you could see the way your heavenly Father sees you, you would know why he cares for you so deeply. You are identified by God and God alone, his wonderful spirit is within you and you shall not fall.

You shall not fall to words of your enemies and you should never question the attributes that the Lord has given you. I ask you to trust him and let him reveal to you, who you really are. Ask him, talk to him like you speak to your friends and tell him that you want to know who he defines you as. Let him know that you want to see his light shine through you and for you, in aspects of your life. Matthew 7:7 says “Ask and you shall receive”, don’t wait.

Just think about it…How would your life change, if you finally accepted the way God created you?

With love, Eripitan XOXO